Day 5 of my alcohol free life

Well, day 5 of my alcohol-free week anyway...

I had a pampering weekend last week, when we finally got away from the thunderstorms in London. I was buffed, scrubbed, massaged, moulded, pummelled, rubbed and steamed into a new me. I felt great. Relaxed, serene, worries away.

After 48 hours of this, my skin began to glow, my eyes were brighter and my mind clearer and more relaxed. It had been a hellish few days leading up to our weekend away, culminating in my receiving a £60 fine for driving in a buslane I thought was peak hours only, but was actually 24 hours... Grrr. Yes, my fault entirely, but my GOD £60 for 10 seconds of driving. That's got to be the most expensive thing I've ever done, per second...

But anyway, what with work pulling me this way and that, the council fining me, the weather delaying our retreat away, too many late nights and too much to do in the meantime, off I popped for a couple of days of R&R. Now, I have to be honest, we did - of course! - bring some tipple with us and enjoyed a glass or three of wine after our healthy evening meals, tucked up in the comfort of our beds, while watching fun dvds... And yes, there were some crisps there too...

Oh ok, I confess all - and a yummy 'flat' Aero (love them; the choccy, not the car)....

But by Sunday morning I was feeling quite "serene". Not like myself at all, and quite enjoying it! My last treatment recommended I have 24 hours alcohol, caffeine and processed-sugar free so I duly obliged. And the wonderful Connie also recommended some detox 'patches' to help the process along.

I rarely ever fall for this kind of marketing ploy, but for just this once I did give it a go. And my goodness, five days later and L thinks someone has stolen his real wife and replaced her with someone who drinks no alcohol, goes to bed early, and gets up before the alarm... the shock in itself nearly killed him! The patches, for those who are novices to it all, go on the soles of your feet at night, one on each. Eight hours later, you pull them off; they look and smell disgusting, it has to be said. For the first two days, my kidneys ached (bad, bad GG, too much booze recently!), I had headaches, and I felt lousy and tired.

Day 3 and BING! I awoke at 7am (v. v. rare in this house, unless I'm catching a plane or something). To L's amazement, I had a normal, friendly conversation with him in bed (instead of grumbling and turning over). I even offered to shower first so he could lie in. And off I popped to work with a spring in my step and a sparkle in my eyes!

Day 4 we both had a lie in and made the most of being awake and sparkly in the morning! Yaay!

Day 5 and I'm still going strong. The aches and pains are all but gone. I have the odd headache, which I think is purely through lack of sugar and caffeine (I don't drink tea or coffee, but I do miss my diet cokes and the odd bit of chocolate!), and I have eaten basic, wholesome foods all week. Snacking has been fruit and fizzy water has replaced the vino. Yes, it's boring as hell but my skin is great, my tummy is shrinking and I've regained that spring in my step.

I am realising now how much I'd let myself slide; how I'd gotten myself into a habit of late nights and headachey, grumpy mornings, how work was stressing me because I want my performance to be as perfect as possible, and how much I was juggling too many things at once. That isn't going to change overnight, and certainly not over a mere five days but if I can repeat the detox process every so often, give myself time to heal, time to feel better and time to look after me and L for a change, then I will reap the benefits. This feels like the me of old; it reminds me of the first summer I spent with L, weekends at his house in the country, bouncing out of bed in the morning with a spring in our step, embracing life together. And six years later, facing the continuous, saddening process that is infertility, we lost that somewhat. We lost the joy we had. We found solace in work, and music and wine bottles. We need to concentrate on finding solace within ourselves. Yes, we were happy - we ARE happy - as a couple. But as an individual, I wasn't as happy as I could be, or should.

And so this little time out, this recharging of batteries... and liver, and kidneys... not to mention brain, lungs, colons etc, etc, has left me feeling better in myself. I have managed not to count the days to my next impending period (I could do if I concentrate hard enough, but I choose not to) and I will give myself another day or two of detox before enjoying the weekend. And having a glass of wine. Or maybe even two.

And definitely a Diet Coke!